Dr. Becky Kennedy

Boundaries are defined by your own planned actions and do not rely on the other person's cooperation or agreement to be effective.

"Boundaries are what you tell someone else you will do, and it requires the other person to do nothing. Making a request, that's not a boundary."

Cooperation is built on a bridge of connection created when you acknowledge and join another person's reality before asking them to join yours.

"He kind of joins my world where I'm embedded in my own priorities and by doing that forms a bridge, that's what connection is. So I can kind of walk back over to his world with him to do something tha..."

Supporting a struggling employee requires identifying and coaching the specific internal skill they lack to manage their current challenges.

"When you look at bad behavior, the actual problem is someone doesn't have the skill they need to manage something happening internally."

Meaningful repair involves moving past the need for perfection to take ownership of mistakes and their impact on others.

"The thing that keeps us from repairing, which really is the idea of going back to a person after a moment we didn't feel proud of, taking responsibility for our part, maybe acknowledging the impact it..."

Effective feedback requires separating a person's identity from their behavior to avoid triggering defensiveness and unproductive conflict.

"The idea of being good inside inherently requires us to separate behavior and identity. We infer a lot from people's behavior. Someone's late to work a lot, 'Oh, that person's lazy.' The quickest way..."

Leadership should prioritize long-term resilience by acknowledging difficulty rather than trying to ensure constant short-term happiness.

"Our whole parenting philosophy is resilience over happiness. When we're thinking about a resilient work culture, we want people who can say, 'This is hard and I can do hard things.'"